chunk of coal

 For Xmas, I bought Kevin a Dallas Cowboy/Washington Commanders, ticket for this Sundays game in DC.

I wish Dallas were doing better, this year they are dismal, Kevin has been so disappointed in them, he is not even wearing his Dallas gear or even watching the games...I really feel bad that the game he is going to, will be a disaster for Dallas....

I feel bad now for the gift.   He will get to go to a game with absolutely no hope of winning,  no hope for excitement or fun...just him in a sea of Commander fans slamming the Cowboys..

I am actually a little worried...I have asked him not to Dallas up (wear all the DC clothing and what not),  in this environment we live in, violence is normal....and the Cowboys are enemies with Washington...If something bad happens to him at that game or after, it will be all my fault.

If Dallas somehow, wins, then if Kevin is in his gear, he will be a fucking target to drunk Commander fans, that will seek revenge on him, solely because he is wearing and supporting the Cowboys...

I wish I had never purchased the ticket....I feel it is a waste of hundreds of dollars, gas time, travel and all that...and I feel I have inadvertently put him at risk..

He seemed so excited to get the ticket, but then the Cowboys have been playing so fucking badly, his excitement for the team is not there, not this year...

He should sell that ticket to a Commander fan....

I wish I had never bought that fucking ticket....I feel like an ass....buying that ticket was the worse present I could have gotten him.....watching that game will only leave him:

disappointed

angry/weary

and unhappy

what a great gift!  fuck

I failed again with that purchase....if Dallas was actually a competitive team, exciting to watch and had a decent coach and players, then the ticket would have been worth it and a great gift.

But now, that great gift is nothing but a "big chunk of coal"....a ticket made of shit.

I can't do anything right...all my good intentions always backfire...my intention was to make him so happy, to surprise him with this gift, let him experience a professional sport in person once again...

I felt it was a reward or bonus for all the hard work he does at the VA, and with me....instead I might as well as "garnished his paycheck" for all the good this worthless football ticket is....

I failed, once again...

S