fucking game

 I have had the same phone number (cell) since the late 1990s...I never changed my number when I would get another cell, or change service providers, I have always been able to keep my same number.

I have lived in the 540 area code for 6 years,  and the vast majority of my calls are from the 405 area code...most are spam or scammers or somebody wanting to buy my home....I usually let 405 calls go unanswered...

Tonight I got a call from a 405 number, so I decided pull a Kevin and pick up the phone with a smart ass hello:

I answered "this is the sparrows nest"...

silence, then I heard a small low voice say, I am looking for Missy...

It was my dad.  He had finally gotten phone privileges and evidently they have my number on file for him to call???  I can't imagine he has memorized that number, so I am a little shocked that St Anthony would have my number...any how...

He was upset, they took all his stuff, even his clothes, he is cold, etc...

He is very confused and obviously still in the same state of mind as when I talked with him last.   He has been transferred from the main hospital to a St Anthony facility in Midwest city.  He is upset because he is locked up, he just wants to go home...

I can relate, been there done that,  so I tried ever so gently to explain to him everything that is going on, and why he is there.  I encouraged him that he would not be there forever, but the first week they are evaluating him, going to get him on some meds and try to get him better so he can leave...

this calmed him some...I tried to tell him about my experience being locked up for the same exact reason....but I am sure he does not remember that...his time for the phone ended and we hung up.

I then called John to let him know I talked with dad, and to give him the number of the facility that dad called from...John did not have that number.  I also told John what dad is feeling and saying, and that I tried to reassure him...

John all of the sudden wanted to talk all about my time being locked up, how hard it was for him,  his experience....and he told me "that I am the perfect person to be able to talk with dad,  and he then insinuated that what I went through was Gods will so that I could be there for my dad, later....

FUCK THAT SHIT  He made me so angry it was all I could do not to reach through the phone and fucking strangle him....he NEVER EVER talked with me about my own experience being locked up, once I came home, it was never spoke of again....NOW he wants to talk all about it??? OMFUCKINGGOD

So god made my entire life and living with john such a fucking nightmare that i felt like I had to kill myself to be free, only to be locked up, so that later on down the road, I could be an example and the voice of experience to my dad???

Is that what a god is, conniving, calculating, cruel and demented...Does he get his rocks off watching people suffer and suffer?? Just so we "might" use our hardship and trauma to help someone else?  Is this just a fucking game to ggggooooddddd??

S