So I was watching a TV show, and in one scene a man was behind a curtain, then "swiped the curtain to the side real hard, and stepped out from behind it"...it was a nothing part of the show, but that particular action was a trigger for me.....I did not know why, but seeing that scene made my ears start ringing and I felt sick and confused.....
Last night, I was sleeping and had a disturbing dream:
I was in the bath tub, with the shower curtain drawn, I thought I was safe and he was not home...the water was really full in the tub and I was laying almost completely under the water, it was so peaceful, I could hear my heartbeat...
then the curtain was ripped back and there he was...staring at me...I thought in my little mind if I went completely under the water, he would not be able to see me...so I put my head under the water and closed my eyes.....maybe he would go away...
I felt his hand on my face, holding me under...I held my breath as long as I could, then panic set in...
water splashed on him, his clothes and that enraged him...he yanked me out of the tub and flung me to the floor....I hit my head on the toilet...
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I woke up....what a horrible dream!!!! did this really happen????
did the TV show, trigger this event?? Now I am confused, was this just a bad dream, or did it really happen?
Who do I need to talk too? Sammy, Ally, 7, who? Is it one of their memories?, 7 does not sleep so no dreaming for them, so maybe Ally or Sammy??
I complain so much about not being able to sleep, then when I do, I have these types of nightmares....fuck....
S, T
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