I apologize

 I would like to apologize to any and all persons who read my last two blog entries (which have now been deleted).

They were out of line, and they made my advocate seem like an uncaring person.  Which is not true...

I was being stupid and ignorant and mean about my feelings and threw a fit here, because I thought it was a safe place...but after my advocate read it, and let it be known his feelings and how much my post hurt and offended him, I realized that sometimes the "little" things like lights and such are just that...fucking little insignificant things that don't matter.  He is fucking right.....

No matter how I try and change some of his habits, I am not doing it for his betterment, I am doing it for mine...fucking selfish self-centered me.

I have it so good here, I have thousands of blessings...these stupid ass "triggers" are just that stupid ass fuck nothing.  I need to grow up and get over it.

So, again, I apologize for myself and whoever else helped me write those last two entries, they were out of line and uncalled for.

Don't let my stupid words influence your opinion of my advocate.  He is a fucking SAINT and deserves a purple heart for dealing with me/us.

S