But still....

 I close my eyes,

but I still find,

the scars that were left behind...

I open my heart

but I still find

a bleeding open wound.

 I shut the door

turn off the lights,

but I still find,

fear in a dream...

afraid to sleep

afraid to stay awake...

silent screams on every take,

but no where to run,

no answers, no solutions, a maze,

but I still find,

the path that leads to pain.

tears well up,

a heart that aches,

but still I find,

no wetness upon my face...

a wandering dog,

looking for a home,

but still I find,

I am hungry and alone.

Birds chirp and fly,

plants bloom and grow,

yet I stay caged,

but still I find,

that I cannot,  be happy,

always scared,  never able to rest,

what is calm?

I have failed the test...

but still I find,

I cannot control my mind...

but still......

S, sammy