Last night I watched a mini-series on Pazuzu Algarad. If you don't remember him, he was arrested and convicted of two murders in 2009. He lived in Winston-salem, NC. His arrest made national news as he was penned a "Satan-Worshipping Killer"...the show was called "The Devil You Know"...
At first the sensationalism of him being a Satanist, captivated the country...all kinds of rumors whirled : he killed 2 prostitutes, his tongue was split and he could move both points independently, his teeth were filed to points, etc.....none of this was true, but the media exploded on the Satanic theme, and the police department totally and utterly fucked up in investigating him...it was a media/police clusterfuck. Which ultimately ended with Pazuzu killing himself in prison.
I watched this show, because the investigator was doing the story on "why, how, when, what" went wrong with this young man...and it also chronicled the stories of Pazuzu's friends from 2009-2018 and their lives...
Pazuzu was the demons name in the show The Exorcists. He changed his name to Pazuzu. This kid from early on, displayed violent tendencies killing animals, being anti-social and at 13 was diagnosed with a schizophrenic diagnosis...He was given vitamins and Ativan. That is it....he was patted on the ass and sent back home...the system failed him...
His mother repeatedly during his childhood tried to get this kid help and the system failed her and failed him. He dropped out of school and became involved with drugs...he continued to do everything in his power to be Anti-establishment. Winston-Salem is in the bible belt, it is a republican, protestant, bible thumping conservative state, so Pazuzu did everything to be anti that.....He embraced Satanism because it was anti-god....he had a following of other drug addicted disaffected youth and his home became a horrible place....yet his mother still lived with him or he lived with his mother....his mother witnessed him and his girlfriend shoot a man...yet she went on to work...she reported the incident to the police, which the police in turn, dropped the ball....the guy they shot, they dismembered and buried in the back yard...then they killed another man, buried him. Multiple people told the police that bodies were buried in that back yard...but the police, did not believe them, because they had tattoos, piercings and were NOT CHRISTIAN.
The mini series also chronicles one of Pazuzus closest friends who was a marine and fought in Iraq. It also chronicled how the US failed this veteran too....During one scene with the soldier he took his cigarette and burned his arm 10 times, and never felt the pain...Sophee has burned my arm also with cigarettes, she does not feel the pain, and I only feel the pain once she is gone....So I get being numb and not feeling...my heart ached for that soldier.
This whole mini series was not just about what Pazuzu did, it was how he got to that point.
I could not help but relate to Pazuzu and the kids around him....I was that kid! I got involved with Satanism, I did drugs, I stole from stores, I was a kid also that fell through the cracks of divorce, and abuse....but instead of going the route Pazuzu went, my mind split and my girls took over...Pazuzu became a murderer and I became split (DID). My girls refocused my rage and anger on myself, so it was myself I hurt, not animals, not others...Self-harm.
My girls saved me from ending up just like Pazuzu and his followers. For that, I am profoundly grateful...it would have been so fucking easy for me to end up in prison or dead...I, as a young child around 6ish, tried twice to kill my step father...my foray into murder...I failed of course....but later at the age of 12, I picked up drugs...drugs kept me from feeling pain, they helped me to forget the trauma and abuse, they made me socially acceptable in certain crowds, in fact, drugs saved my life....
If I had not picked up drugs and learned at that young age how to quell my thoughts, feelings and potential violent tendencies, then I would not be here today.
Of course, drugs have the downside also, addiction and shit like that, which I also suffered from until I was detoxed...
I recommend this mini-series to everybody...not because of the sensationalism of Satanism and the Occult, but the look behind the mask....nobody is born a monster, they are raised to be monsters, they are misdiagnosed, bullied and abused...Pazuzus mother was abusive to him, which he in turn abused her...been there did that...as a child....
After the show was over, I sat and thought about it...realizing how "lucky" I am to have DID. Fuck, never thought I would say that...but there it is...I am blessed to have DID, it saved my life...not god, not fucking jesus, not my parents, but my alters....and now, my advocate continues to save my life...our lives, me and my girls.
This show did not focus and concentrate on being in a bible belt state, for that I am so grateful, no preachers on the show...it did not have religious undertones. It did not say "well he just needed to get saved" none of that bullshit..it was frank, honest, and horrifying and showed that religion and Jesus is nothing but a fucking joke...and so many kids are falling through the "christian" cracks....
The show chronicled reality. America the great??? I think not.
S, T, sophee
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