So the last post was about my health issues...and I wondered if the girls knew I had brain tumors. I posted this on my facebook page, and a friend said to ask the girls! DUH, so I posed the question on my whiteboard.
My advocate talked with 7 about the tumors. She is aware that I (Sparrow) has tumors as is Tessa. BUT, they think that is only me, Sparrow. They don't have brain tumors.......
WHAT???
Probably Sammy and Sophee would also say that they know of the tumors, but they don't have any....Ally will feel my headaches, so she knows something is wrong, but she is 6, so she doesn't really care...
Since they are all in my head...of course they have brain tumors too....but, when they front, they are very separate personalities and people...a brain tumor diagnosis was not given to them, it was given to Sparrow. Maybe had Tessa been fronting when the doctor delivered the news, then she would think she has the tumors....I don't know, it is so hard to figure out what they know, how they think, etc.....
But they are aware of my brain cancer. Is Sammy aware? or Sophee? I know that Lilly is aware of them, she knows and watches and listens to everything, she is the controller of "Sparrow"...she was the first, the boss...but I do not want her to front to answer the question on the board...why?
Because when Lilly fronts, I get a thunderclap headache that literally puts me down....
My advocate asked once, I believe he asked Tessa, "why does Lilly hurt Sparrows head when she fronts?" Her response was not verbatim but kinda like this "when anyone of us front, we still are around...Like "sitting in a room, when one speaks she stands up and the attention is on her, while the others sit around and listen" but when Lilly fronts, she takes up the entire room...nobody is sitting around watching...she uses my entire brain to front while the others don't.
That is why her appearance causes thunderclap head pain...all the girls are aware of Lilly. They know Lilly is the top dog...if you will!! so funny the shit that DID brings...
So in summary: the alters, girls, are aware of Sparrow, what she does, how she feels, etc...so when Sparrow is sick, only sparrow is sick, the others don't feel they are sick....but they have to deal with Sparrows body when she is sick...Now Ally, will front and complain of a stuffy nose, or headache or whatever..she feels all Sparrows aches and pains and voices that to the advocate. I do not think that the other girls voice health issues at all....
S
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PS. 7 fronted last night and my advocate asked her if she knew that Sparrow had brain tumors. She did not. She did not even know what a brain tumor was, but she did remember the brain surgery I had. So he explained it all to her.
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