Sammy

 So, another video was released.   This one about Sammy....she is my  mute alter, and my dancer and lover of music....

I have to say, while my advocate was filming, I could not be in the room....I did not want to hear his assessment of Sammy...for some reason, I felt "protective" of her and me...we do not know alot about her, because she does not speak, and she does not really like to write on paper...she will type on this blog, her poems and stuff...but actually hold pen to paper is hard for her to do....so she signs....

Because Sammy never speaks, I will never know what happened to spawn her in my head...I know that, as my advocate said, a hand was held over her mouth and she was threatened to keep silent (she told him that) but aside from that...I just don't know....she has the memories...

I believe that she got her love of music from my mother.  My mom use to play alot of music on her record player...she loved Crosby Stills and Nash, ballads, easy rock...I to this day, love the same band/singers.  Where my mother sang (she has a beautiful voice), Sammy does not sing....my mom once told me when she heard me singing as a kid..."you have a horrible voice, don't sing, it is hurting my ears...."  so, I have never sang again.  In school, I was not in choir, and I only sing now in private...which I love to sing, but I have a horrible singing voice!!!!

Sammy chose to dance....you can dance in silence...you can dance at a club, the music is so loud you do not and cannot talk...you just shut your eyes and dance.  

Sammy could hear my moms music, and she could dance in an area of the house that her mother did not see her...obviously if mom would have seen me/her dancing she would have told me how horrible a dancer I was....I am so glad, my mom never saw me dance.  Because now I can dance and feel good about myself...Sammy can dance all she wants...

You don't have to speak to dance.  Dancing allows the body to speak, to scream, to voice the voiceless...Sammy speaks through her dancing.  My advocate has filmed her dancing...she is good, she is more of the "exotic" dancer type,  maybe a stripper?? where I am more of a "ham" dancer...goofy and awkward...she is smooth and creative and seductive and knows how to move her body to music.....

I want to know more about Sammy, but then I am fearful of learning more....

S