Tuesday, June 15, 2021

Seven

 I have had a weird past couple of days.  I have been so out of it, and disassociating a lot.  I do know now for a fact that I have another alter...my advocate finally talked to her and asked her her name, he said she said her name is Seven...which doesn't make any fucking sense....

But he said she was calm and not tearing my house and Sparrow apart....

The past two days, or three or whenever, my days are kinda mixed up, have been very rough, I have had nightmares and been so fucking out of it.....but last night my advocate drugged me basically and I slept 12 hours straight.  I feel very rested, but still like something is off....

I will wait it out.   

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On another note, I talked with my X husband.  I told him that I have been in therapy and am learning alot about myself.  I mentioned that I had different personalities, and he said "yea, I remember your fits"...he is mentioning the rages I would have, or I should say one of my girls would have...but it did not click in his head that I have DID, but I have layed the pavework to gradually bring into my family my "mess, which is my DID"..

we had a good conversation.  I am really hoping that when my diagnosis comes out, my family will not shun me...my X seemed open the idea that I am not "normal"...so we will see.....

S

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