Cooking

I really do not like to cook.  I would rather clean up and let someone else do the cooking.....

For me, I believe Tessa does the most cooking.  Before a meal, I lay out all the ingredients, then systematically make the dinner.  Or at least I always thought it was me....but I believe that is Tessa.  Tessa likes lists and things done in order...When I am in the kitchen, my mind wanders...I think about other things, not what I am making...then before I know it, the meal is ready, and I am like "well shit"....ok then....never thought much about it until now.

During the holiday season I like to make chex mix for my neighbors as a gift.  Making it from scratch is very systematic.  Mix, stir, bake 15 minutes, stir, another 15 minutes, stir another 15 minutes,stir and a final 15 minutes..an hour a batch...So I keep a record of how many times I have stirred the mix by making marks.

This is three batches of chex mix.  Notice the marks and circles?  

My advocate noticed something...some of the marks are black and some are blue....remember the alters all picked a certain color marker to leave notes or whatever...Tessa picked blue, and black is mine, Sparrow.   On the picture above, some of the lines are blue and a circle is blue.  This is Tessa, she did the stirring and mixing at those times....so we basically went back and forth making chex mix...I did not notice the board at all....sometimes the alters hide things from me, even though they are in plain sight to everyone else, to me they are hidden.

It is interesting sometimes after come home from a grocery store or department store and finding items in my bags I did not consciously buy.  It use to freak me out, like I stole them, but looking at my receipt, the items are always paid for.   For example, Ally likes these horrible nasty little curly cue barbeque chips...occasionally I will be putting groceries away and there they are....bought and paid for.  But not something I would have bought as Sparrow.  So Ally put them in the basket and while checking out at the register, she shielded my eyes from noticing the chips....I do not understand how this works, but it does, and I believe all the alters do this to some degree.  Its like extreme dementia (almost)..

I also know that when I am craving meat, like a hamburger, I know that is usually Tessa or one of the alters as they all eat meat...but me.  Sometimes I will crave a big soft pretzel, out of the blue, and now I know when I get that craving it is Sammy.  Sammy loves soft pretzels...the girls (alters) do write their requests on the dry erase board every once and awhile...but mostly their requests are in my head ie..an unusual craving for meat, or pretzels, or nasty chips, or an overwhelming emotion that is not jiving with the situation...

I am really trying to listen more to my head, my body and my thoughts...because there are 7 total of me, and I need to tune into them too....Herd immunity in my head....hahaha

S