feelings times 7

Hmmm, so I have been wondering about something.  I believe that I have even discussed this with my advocate.  

I have 6 alters, 7 if you count Sparrow as an alter...each girl have their own likes, desires, wants and needs...

I have always been a really passionate person.  If I love, I love with all I have, if I don't like or hate, I hate with a passion.  There is no grey area with me, it is either black or white.

So here is my question:  Do I feel "more intently" because there are other personalities inside my head?  I mean, I hate onions, but I hate them so much maybe one of my others hates onions too, so there is double the hate....

I love sex,  I can go all night, have multiple orgasm and become so intense in the coupling....I am wondering if my desire for sex is heightened by the fact that 3 of my other alters loves sex too.  Four times the desire....

 If I am sad, I can be so sad that I become suicidal or distraught...If my other girls are sad, that affects me and makes me sadder...sometimes I am so sad and I don't even know why.

Having alters have "heightened" my senses and emotions...I am hyper sensitive because there are 7 personalities living inside me..I feel their pain, happiness, sadness, desires etc...I don't see them or talk to them, but I can feel them.

I feel when Ally wants to front...I feel a giggle deep in my chest...that is indication of Ally.  Every once in awhile I can see myself playing with dolls, I can see ally, but it is as if I am looking through a very long skinny tube and all sound is a mumbling. I cannot make out what she is saying...

I feel Sophee when I am very frustrated or angry with myself, I feel my fist clenching and anger/rage deep in my chest...I feel irritated and unsettled...I don't see her or talk to her or hear her...

I know when Lilly is around, because my head will start pounding and I can see a "silhouette" of her form just over and behind my right shoulder, just out of my line of vision...I can't describe her, but I get of sense of her watching me...I don't talk to her, she does not talk to me.

Can you imagine what it must be like to be scared of someone or something but not know why?  Because one of the others is scared, I will feel fear...and not know why...

I use to think (way back before I was aware I had alters) that I might be bi-polar, simply because my emotions are so "over the top" at times...extremely happy and energetic/sad, depressed, suicidal....now I know that when my "emotions are over the top" it is most likely because one or more alters are feeling what I am feeling too...3x the emotions.....

This knowledge is a relief to me...I am not mentally ill, I am not manic depressive...I have a mental condition...I feel times 7!

S.T