narcissist

So, I had written about what it must have been like for my kids to have a mom with DID.  How it must have been so hard for them, my fears as a mom etc...

But it was explained to me, that I should not have those fears or thoughts etc...so I deleted my post.  Evidently my alters only effect me, not my kids.  Ok, good to know.

So I guess my kids are good, protected from mom, whatever...
and I really shouldn't write about what is actually not an issue.  It was an issue in my own head, but that is the problem...AN ISSUE IN MY OWN HEAD AND NOT MY KIDS...

I guess it is senseless to write about me, or what I think or feel, because in reality my feelings are only me.  Nobody else, family, friends whatever, really notice or think about me and my behavior, that is all on me.  Talk about narcissistic...

I get that now.   I live in a fantasy world of alters, but reality is reality....My alters are only a problem to me...no one else even notices or much less cares....its just life.

Well that is a revelation.  What I have perceived as all consuming does not even make a blip on the screen of reality.  Alters are nothing...I, of course, am nothing too.

S