My purpose

I have heard people say "what is my purpose in life" then they go on to find that purpose and they are fulfilled and happy...

When you were never meant to be born, then hated the minute you came out of your mothers womb...kinda fucks what the purpose was for in the first place...

I have discovered what my purpose is:

To be abused as a child in the most graphic and disgusting ways...a throw away child
to be used and manipulated as a teenager,
To give birth to children to perpetuate the species...
To be treated like a dog...
To be used for the gain of others in whatever they want or desire...
a whipping board
a person that others can hate and ridicule and bully
a medical crash dummy for doctors
to be other peoples trash...
to never be happy, but to suffer...physically, mentally and emotionally
to be an example of a fuck brain
to serve others, but hurt myself

Someone posted a meme on my facebook page that showed a toddler and it said :

             "A child that's being abused by its parents doesn't
              stop loving its parents,  it stops loving itself"  
                                            -Shahida Arabi

I stopped loving myself, the first time I was hit and humiliated...  I stopped loving myself, because my environment and the people that were "suppose" to love me, didn't love me, so it was stupid of me to love myself..

The "love" center of my brain, never developed..so it is warped and deformed...like my fucking head...like my fucking body, like everything about me...