So, this is the first holiday season, I have been alone. NO family, no company, no cooking, no shopping, nothing...just another day in the month...
Thanksgiving, I spent watching TV in bed...
Now, Christmas....I wonder what it will be like to wake up christmas morning to NOTHING...no kids, no grandkids, no family, no food, no presents....
I wonder if I will just lay in bed all day and watch TV..
I wonder if I will be sad? I know, that I deserve to be alone..I left my family, my life... I have made my bed, now I have to lie in it...haha...
The funny thing is, I did not choose to leave my family...My shit fuck tumor infested, split mind, brain injury and overall stupid brain fuck forced me to leave...it was either leave or die....nobody understands that...my husband told me that I have "destroyed him, the family"...REALLY? my brain has destroyed me....
So, Christmas morning, I will sleep in...take Boomer to the park...and enjoy the fact that I am not dead...not yet....
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