My daddy died in 07...He was the first of all his 5 siblings to die. He was also the youngest. Since his death, two of his sisters have also passed away. This past week, his brother, my Uncle RV passed away. Leaving only 2 sisters left, one being the oldest sibling.
It is a weird thought knowing that before long, all of my daddy's siblings and immediate family will be dead and gone...
I sent a text to my x-husband to let him know that my uncle had died.
His response, "do you even care anymore about family?" That statement hit me like a ton of bricks to the face....
Do I come across as non-caring? Has my brain issues made me seem like a non feeling, non emotional, non person???Just because I left my husband and family and oklahoma, does not mean I am a monster...I love my family, I loved my uncle...I still feel loss and love...I feel happiness and sadness, I feel guilt, shame, anger...I still l have normal "human" feelings...
I just forget more, I don't think about calling or keeping in touch with relatives and family...I don't remember so much of my life it doesn't occur to me to be "emotional or whatever..." I just flat don't think about relatives and people...I don't remember to call or text...I just do good to keep myself busy and occupied during the day...I don't chase drama...and family is drama..and I can't handle drama...not anymore...
So my x-husband, since my departure, has called me "unfeeling", "uncaring", has told me "I have destroyed the family", "I have destroyed him" and every other damn thing....then he wonders why I do not call or keep up with family dynamics...do I really need to hear my "downfall" every time I am on the phone???
I am sad that my uncle died. Sad for his wife and family, they will miss him, just like I miss my daddy. I am not sad that he actually died...everyone dies...dying is a part of living...in fact, his death means he can be with his brother again...
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